Concerns
Monday, April 7, 10:09 PM
Um, I'm having fits of loneliness? I slept for four hours today from 5-9, and during the keynote speaker on the Halocaust today. Shame on me, I was sleeping enough for yesterday, but I don't know what's with me today. In badminton, I felt uncoordinated and it really showed. I wasn't upset, but really impressed with what Christina can do with raquet sports now. I really want a study buddy for Geometry. Miss Nguyen clearly doesn't cut it. I'm glad to be going to French class tomorrow, but I wonder if I'm missing something. Tomorrow is Phuc's birthday, I must convince my dad to drive me to Bay Buffet at 6. Today, I forgot it was Free Hugs Day. I was too caught up in trying to concentrate during the day. I did enough to pass Miss Nguyen's class with an A, but I'm concerned that I'm falling behind. During the 4-hour slumber, I had a vision of me during Junior, or later years of college. I was speaking to others on applying for this high position, of which I don't know of now. I read proudly at a camera, "If you recently find yourself angering, ill-stricken, or in a recent traumatic experience, then I must ask you to remove yourself from the list of applicants. Perhaps, you'll be better suited off with next year's potentials. If you are deeply involved in a religious organization, then we aren't able to consider you. We make no discrimination against race, sexual orientation or gender itself, but we judge our candiates on their level of commitment, neutrality, professionalism and experience. I can only hope the best to all those motivated in running..." To find myself in the acme of my academic career, quoting those lines, would be not only amazing, but astounding.
In the past, I've turning to writing as a release of stress. With a problem or major event in my life, I would write pages and pages of material. I write so I choose not to forget. I did delete 2 years of material on the closing of one of my journal sites. I don't mind; it scares me that I didn't care. The concept of my past will still stay with me, right? I've pondered on whom my rolemodels might be today. Regarding celebrity rolemodels, I'd have to say they'd be Alton Brown, Jack Lallanne, and Ellen DeGeneres. There's more, but I know these are the poserhouses of great influence on me. Notice that they aren't known for their wealth in particular, but for their ability to be entertaining, happy as well as charismatic. I will prevail over these gloomy days, no, no had times, but I will feel better. I will do more than sleep my days away. On Sunday, I went with my dad grocery shopping. I doted him on the benefits of buying fresh food and cooking it yourself at home. I also told him it saved money, that was a deal-sealer. Today, I prepared my own lunch and it made me feel more accomplished.
